The debate — rigged, rigged, rigged. They sabotaged my microphones. Democrats. They were all over the place. Crooked Hillary and Barnacle Bill (if you catch my drift). CNN,the New York Times, USA Today, even some of my own advisers. (I’m like Julius Caesar surrounded by a bunch of Et Tu Brutuses.) I won that debate, even with all the rigging. I demolished Crooked Hillary. And now my own people want to have Fat Boy Chris Christie coach me. It’s OK. Fat guys are cool; fat guys are fun. Fat women, ugh. But I love them, even if they’re fat. And I love Mexicans and Muslims and Argentinian bimbos and colored people and LGBTs and LSMFTs and everybody. I love everybody. They want me to be a big tent, how’s that for big tent? My tent is sooo big. G’night.